How Love Can Flourish in the Workplace and the Nature of Romance with Krish Phua

Krish Phua is a registered Counsellor, Psychotherapist and Certified Clinical Supervisor who specializes in Gender and Sexuality. Throughout his career, he found that there is an important need to blend coaching and counseling to best align with his passion for helping others. His organization Underneath The Moon taps into the vulnerability of night and the moon’s silent vigil over darkness to relate to our own need to be vulnerable.  

The differences between counseling and coaching and setting clear expectations on both the coach’s and the client’s end, that workplace romances are a normal occurrence so while there are drawbacks there can also be major opportunities and that we as people are growing, much like how plants adjust to their obstacles, so do we. We talk about the nature of change and how we can influence others but not be agents of control and how there are many involved parties at the workplace who could be involved in it.

Find Krish online

https://www.underneaththemoon.com/

Find us online

https://impactfulcoachingpodcast.com/

3:45 To kick off our episode on Romance and especially of the workplace nature, we start by learning about Krish Phua’s role in the coaching space with his online platform Underneath The Moon. He talks about the differences and similarities between counseling and coaching. 

7:07 Joseph asks Krish if there were challenges identifying which skillset to draw from when helping clients.

11:01 Joseph alludes night time to our historical vulnerability to the dangers of the unknown, however as we evolve we learn to use darkness to our advantage, but because the moon is an icon of romance and night and vulnerability, where does the sun tie in to this?

14:52 Joseph asks is the night time used as some form of utility in providing services to clients? Krish discusses how his daytime role as well as that of his clients make evenings and weekends a more practical time to provide his services.

20:00 Joseph asks, after having received definitions on both romance and workplace related romance, that a couple can be so in sync that they’re essentially one person what other configurations are known?

24:41 Krish talks about how because workplace settings lead to availability, proximity and presentability, one particular configuration is the hookup in the workplace setting, its a complicated mix of familiarity and novelty.

28:27 Krish talks about the reasons as to why issues resolve; values, careers, relocation, parenting/parentage and financial that indicate why couples drift away and seek something short term,

32:00 Joseph and Krish share thoughts on how important it is to grow for your partner as well as yourself, otherwise we end up being co-selfish with one another which can be difficult if a child, someone dependent on the parents, emerges into the picture. 

39:00: Krish details some of the major questions we should ask in a workplace romance: Is it hierarchical? Does it affect work positively or negatively? What do we do if there is a split?

45:07 Having outlined the issues Joseph sees with the power imbalance of an employee to a manager, which is different from a customer to staff member, or two students in the same grade the power imbalance can lead to ambiguity of intent.

49:09 Joseph asks if Krish has any personal experience to speak to regarding the nature of productivity and output, if he’d seen any data to suggest the outcome one way or another.

54:58 in discussing the downsides of pre-arranged agreements on a breakup, such as a prenup, it challenges the deeper faith we have in relationships and pursuits. Joseph makes a point about general preparedness and faith in our adaptability as humans. 

1:02:02 Joseph reflects on his past experience learning about short-term, project based organizations and how that may lead to more short-term romances, he asks Krish what changes he thinks is coming.